yeahiwasintheshit:

prguitarman:

yeahiwasintheshit:

THIS IS MONEY PENIS, REBLOG WITHIN 5 MINUTES AND MONEY WILL COME ALL OVER YOU WITHIN 24 HOURS

Shoot your money all over my face

i just posted this stupid thing last night and i swear to god my brother came over today and said oh by the way heres the $300 i owe you. no fucking lie!

Hshshahahaha

Omg hi huhu

hoodoo-hoodlum:

I’m so mad because this worked

luna-bars-and-oatmeal:

noodle-dragon:

the-philosophers-bone:

acabosetotal:

harukami:

gothiccharmschool:

seananmcguire:

kanayahavethisdance:

Fuck I’m at a fencing tournament and literally a minute after I reblogged this my dad told me that he talked to the point people and I’m probably going to win a medal.

BURN BAGEL BURN

OH WHY NOT?

I need to follow up to say I reblogged this last night, and this morning I got some of the best news of my life, like, a life dream come true news thing.

Bagel what are your powers

FUCK, I though it was just another lucky meme but LISTEN. Since a week ago I was waiting a phone call to confirm me if I got a job or not in my university. I reblogged this yesterday’s night “just for fun and because I don’t want any bagel to be mad with me”, and today’s afternoon, while I was losing my time as always, the professor I was supposed to work with called me and asked me for my personal information to start working with her.

THE BAGEL POWERS ARE WAY TOO MUCH FOR THIS WORLD

I GOT A JOB THE DAY AFTER MY QUEUE POSTED THIS THE FIRST TIME AND I JUST REALIZED IT WHEN I SAW IT AGAIN HOLY GOD

The bagel hasn’t let me down yet!

Reblogging this bagel because why not??

wire-man:

askamericatheheroyeah:

seriffluoride:

carrying—my—crosses:

doodlee-a:

GUYS, THIS IS IMPORTANT. I’ve been a lifeguard for four years, and I didn’t fully appreciate this until a little kid jumped into the shallow end of the lap pool. He wasn’t flailing. His eyes were wide in panic and h would try and push himself off the bottom, but the water was right over his head. It took me a couple seconds to register what had happened, and fortunately, another swimmer right beside the kid managed to grab him when he saw my reaction.

My mother and I run a water safety non-profit organization and this is one of the things we teach.

In movies someone who is drowning always yells and screams and it’s very dramatic and obvious but in real life you really have to be paying attention

I was on holiday in Egypt when I was 14, and there was a 4-year-old Italian boy I had to save because no-one else even thought he was in trouble. Luckily, the water wasn’t too deep and only came up to my waist, but the kid was so small it covered his head. All he did was gasp for air and angle his head up, and tried kicking off the pool floor while reaching his hands up. I sat him on the edge of the pool in the shallow end and then his mother came over and thanked me.

I didn’t think much of it then, but I saved a life that day.

THIS COULD LITERALLY SAVE A LIFE.

After 2 years of lifeguarding and many more of competitive swimming I can verify this. Drowning signs are eerily quiet. It helps to catch them early. The pool I worked at had a large amount of regular clients. I’d always keep an extra lookout for people I didn’t recognize since I didn’t know their swimming ability. Their face aiming towards the sky is the first thing they’ll almost always do. Especially children.

laughingsquid:

Taiwanese Pet Groomers Give Haircuts to Small Dogs to Make Their Heads Appear Perfectly Square or Round

mariopowertennis:

PIS PA POINT BU PASS ME A JOINT GOTTA TWO SIS BE IMMA SPRING MY JOINT STREET CRED RAP ONE TO THE PA PA PU NO JOOTARANG SID YA NO